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cross-posted to note_to_cat

Dearest Ram-cat,

Dude! I almost had the creepy guy hawking Dianetics away from the house (whatever happened to good, old-fashioned Jehovah's Witnesses, eh? At least they cleaned up a bit before going door-to-door), and what do you do? Decide that now is the time to make a run for it. Idgit cat. But thank you for allowing me to catch you so quickly (considering this was the first time you'd run out on me while I was at home by myself - your daddy can snag you faster than anything), and for not clawing the hell out of me when I brought you back home. Hissing at the creepy Dianetics guy was a nice touch. (The jerk opened the door after I went sprinting after the cat! We have another indoor-only cat, and I couldn't find her right away when I came back in. Fortunately, she was just hiding because she heard a strange voice.)

Love,
one of the food providers.

P.S. NO, YOU CAN'T GO OUTSIDE! Stop meowing so pathetically at the door, dingus - you're an indoor cat!

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