Setaú úta (setauuta) wrote,
Setaú úta

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I wrote another entry last night in my notebook, but as it's not here and I am, I'll put these in order later when I post it.


I went to lunch with Tim today. Surprisingly, it went much much better than I'd thought last night. Granted, I didn't recognize him at all when he came up to me at the corner where we'd planned to meet ("OK, some random guy is coming up to me...don't make eye contact...wait, it's Tim!"), but it went reasonably well. I spent most of the time talking about Bret, of course, and he spent most of his time talking about Rosie (the one brief moment of pain I felt came when he showed me the picture of her he carries in his wallet and realizing he'd never carried my picture in there...that I don't think anybody not related to me ever has...but that passed quickly). Apparently, she was a trifle concerned when he told her that I'd rather not meet her at this particular lunch. She's worried I still have feelings for him, basically. Up until I saw him, I admit the thought nagged the back of my mind just a smidge, too. Now? Not so much. I don't think there's any of that interest or anything there anymore, on either side, which is probably why it was so much more comfortable than I was worried it would be.

There was also the fact that the more I talked about Bret, the more I kept warming up to the subject. I told him how we met, how we got to know each other (hurrah for tango, is all I have to say), and realized more and more just how much he's grown to mean to me. I guess I didn't really realize it until I articulated it to Tim. He asked me at one point if I was sure I loved Bret. I didn't even need to stop and think, I just answered immediately yes. Which is an amazing feeling, I have to say.

OK, it's getting really sticky in here with all the sap. Suffice to say Tim and I got along reasonably well, and, being Tim, he apologized again for everything that happened last year. Someday I'll get around to explaining some of that, but the basic idea is that he left to go to vet school, decided we should have an "open relationship", went ballistic when I actually followed through with it, then dumped me for Rosie, to whom he is now engaged. Much ickiness flowed along the way, but I think that's finally, finally water under the bridge. A bridge that isn't quite burned, it seems.

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