Setaú úta (setauuta) wrote,
Setaú úta

Another email from the ex

So, before St. Louis--the King of France in this case, not the city--went on Crusade he called together all the nobles and vassals and even the commonfolk of the realm to address their grievances and set as many wrongs right as he could before he left the kingdom. He adjudicated and settled as many injustices as he found, because he was a good King and that was the sort of thing he did. Then he left and got terribly slaughtered by the Egyptians. Anyways.

I guess what I'm trying to say here, is that I just watched my two best friends break up in a very unfair way. I'm not going to say who acted in an unfair manner, because they're still both my best friends, but I'd like to know if I've wronged anyone during the course of a break-up. I've tried to do my best in the course of these things, and I know I'm not perfect, but if anyone has any grievances right now, like Louis, I am ready to listen.

And if you don't, just kindly forget I said anything.

Mattfully Matt,

Several things:

This is the ex with whom I had the most painful breakup of my life. This breakup led to many, MANY arguments about who did what, and every time, it came down as being entirely my fault. I was the cause of the breakup, and the resulting drama. At least, that was the decision made during and after the arguments. If he wasn't willing to take any responsibility then, what makes me think he would now?

I've told him that we need to stay out of each other's lives. We were great friends, ok lovers, and rotten exes. The transition between the stages was awful, and has made it (in my mind) impossible to return to the beginning. He had agreed, and now he's bring this up again.

I've gotten over him. The breakup took a bit longer to get over, and I feel like the scars have faded - not gone completely (I don't think some of them will ever go away), but not something I really think about anymore. Now, it's being brought up again.

I have the option of being truthful, telling him how I feel, and helping him get through whatever he's dealing with. Or, I can ignore it and move along with my life, as it's no longer my responsibility to help save him. My concience would hate me, but I might be able to move on more effectively. I'm getting married in a few months, for crying out loud!

Tags: ex
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